30 Comments

I can’t believe that I am the first person to like and comment on this post. Reading this hit my heart in a way not many can understand! For so long I wished I was older and knew then what I know now. That I could have rescued that girl in middle school and high school. But I read your stories and see your beautiful family and know that what you have gone through has made you who you are today! Strong, vibrant and beautiful! I am so proud of you Stefie!!!!

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You did rescue me. You gave me a place to hide when I needed it. Which was often. And you are the only person left on this planet allowed to call me Stefie. ❤️

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I am crying reading your story here, and even though I have not hugged you at Peets Coffee in about a decade, I feel your virtual embrace through this letter.

Your kind heart is rare and your family is so beautiful.

The survivors of pain who decide to sprinkle kindness instead of living life serving the attitude they were always shown - HEROS.

THRILLED to be able to stay connected via Substack- I hope one day to proudly share your book (to come) with all my friends.

Xx

Kay Kay 🤍

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You are truly amazing. I miss seeing your face. We need to remedy that soon. 🤎

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Yes! We need a coffee (or tea) date! My son turns four on Monday- you have got to see this little minion. 💙

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That is absolutely crazy!

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Glad I subscribed! You’re the strongest woman ever! I love you!!

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Thank you sweets. I love you so very much.

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I love everything about this beautiful family and am grateful to also get a seat at your table. Love you and thank you for sharing your stories❤️❤️

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We love you back Aunt Carrie. ❤️

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What a beautifully written piece! Thank you so much for sharing your story. I can only imagine the bigotry you faced throughout your journey. As a gay woman, I have experienced similar separation, hatred, and shunning. If people have a problem with who I am, that's their problem - not mine. Love each other. It's the best gift we can give.

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You are correct about that. It’s their problem.

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The heartache and beauty of life.

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It is indeed. 🤎

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In case it helps: We are the parents of a 15 year old, and have friends of varying ages with children in all sorts of different places across the country. My wife and I experienced some of the stuff you write about here. While many of those same feelings and words surrounded us growing up, I can say with unequivocal confidence that younger generations are infinitely more welcoming of relationships like the ones you speak of. In fact, most don’t even bat at eye.

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It sure is different and I love seeing it. We have three boys. The oldest is 29, the youngest 18. Their generation and the people in their circles are much different. It depends a lot on who raises you and where. Agreed progress is being made, we need to keep it moving forward.

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A beautifully written post that relates to so many people thank you Stefanie ❤️

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Thank you Jo. I am a fan of your writing so that means a lot to me. ❤️

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Just such a beautiful piece.

🙌🙌🙌

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Thank you Abbey. Appreciate the love. ❤️

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This is BEAUTIFUL 🤍 What a journey!

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Thank you friend. It has been a journey indeed.

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This is so beautiful and succinct. So much to reflect on and to appreciate. You are a survivor and you have made admirable - brave choices! You are the mother of strong men who have you in their corner to help shine a light their paths. ❤️

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I was raised by a divorced Jewish mom and a not-quite-practicing Presbyterian dad. I married a not-quite-practicing Methodist. We have a phenomenal daughter who grew in our hearts rather than my uterus and a stellar son who happens to be gay, and we are all anti-religious Democrat vegetarian Texans. We are hodge-podgy too and wouldn't want it any other way.

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Beautiful writing. Important message. Thank you for being brave.

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Dearest Stef,

Thank you for your transparency. This was vulnerable and beautifully written.

You and your family are my family. You will always have me in your corner.

The amazing thing about God is that He loves each of us and meets us where we are at when we seek Him.

I love you all, more than I can say.

Tracie

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Absolutely loved reading this, learning more about out you even when I thought I already couldn’t love you more. I’m sorry you ever had to eat lunch alone. 🧡🍸

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Look at the beautiful family - and place of belonging - you've created for yourself!

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